San Francisco – natalie b. compton

Return to America

September 17, 2015September 17, 2015 NatBCo6 Comments

TL;DR – I’m in America for the first time in a year, it’s weird / Japan was hard

I am in a Jamba Juice in San Leandro staring out the window at a Togo’s and a car wash. I am back in California, and it feels so weird.

I return after an emotionally tumultuous three weeks in Japan. The country turned out to be way more isolating than I had predicted thanks to a number of things. First, I don’t speak any Japanese and most people in Japan do not speak English. Second, the Japanese culture isn’t all about chatting up strangers, especially foreign strangers. Third, it’s very quiet in Japan, so I spent a lot of time trying to stay as silent as possible and blend into society. Toss all of that together and you have one tough trip for an extrovert.

I honestly can’t believe how intensely sad I got in such a short period of time, but I really struggled to stay happy in Tokyo and Tahara. Some days I slept for 13 hours, then spent 3-5 more in bed just looking at the Internet. Mind you, I am completely aware of how melodramatic this sounds. I’d do my fair share of walking around, exploring, taking random ferries or busses, then I’d feel exhausted/defeated and go home. A few things got me through my time in Japan: running, drinking with strangers, and working.

Jogging was a godsend. Released endorphins, upbeat music, fresh air, and happy fellow joggers lifted me out of the inexplicably heavy darkness. My favorite jogging routes were along the seemingly endless Tama River, and around Tokyo’s Imperial Palace at dusk ( minus the swarms of gnats that frequented the palace moat. I had to constantly rub them out of my eyes and when I was finished running, I had dead gnats smashed against my arms, neck, and face ).

Drinking with strangers rescued me from my silent loneliness. No one is going to talk to you on the subway, or in line at a coffee shop, so the only places to strike up conversations were in intimate Tokyo bars – I’m talking 7 seats intimate, these places are tiny. The later the better was the recipe for success. If I hit up a bar too early, my Japanese neighbors wouldn’t have enough liquid courage yet to find out what the crazy gaijin (foreigner) was doing there.

After 10 or 11 pm, tongues loosened (mine included) and broken English conversations ensued. Befriending foreigners was also crucial, and those rare times hanging out with fellow westerners were fantastic. It was nice to hear that other people felt the same melancholy I did in the biggest city in the world.

Working was the last element that kept me sane in Japan. Retreating to cafés to work on stories let me check out of my immediate reality for a while and focus on something other than my ridiculous misery. Unfortunately, there weren’t many places with free-flowing Internet access, so I ended up paying a small fortune to spend time at co-working spaces.

Despite all the first world problems bringing me down, I could not deny that Japan was absolutely incredible. The country is unreal on a million levels. Wildly clean, efficiently modern, and infinitely cooler than me. Everyone is impeccably dressed from the salarymen in perfectly tailored suits to the Shimokitazawa hipsters layering random things and looking great doing it.

The bottom line is that Japan is amazing. Everyone should go at some point in their lives, but prepare yourself before the journey. Learn a little Japanese, IT GOES A LONG WAY. Carefully choose where you want to stay. Get mentally ready to be an outsider.

I had a 17 hour layover in China that I spent mostly standing in infuriating lines at the Beijing airport. I did get the chance to explore the Forbidden City a little and eat some “Old Beijing” pastries, then it was time to hop on my 11 hour flight back to the USA.

The flight was a breeze. I did my best not to look at the clock and tried to ignore my increasingly uncomfortable head cold I caught in Tokyo. Before I knew it, the plane was landing at SFO. I was home. The flight was so easy that it was anticlimactic stepping off the plane. SFO has greatly improved its foreign entry process, and going through customs was a breeze. Suddenly I had my backpack and was sitting on the BART headed into the city. San Francisco was as beautiful as I had left it. It was all so completely normal and familiar. I cried three times.

I came back to be with my family, but my cold prevented me from meeting my sweet baby niece so I stayed in the Outer Sunset for a handful of days. The mix of being sick, being home for the first time, and being in the otherworldly Outer Sunset gloom was weird. I felt like I was walking in a dream. It was way too normal to be true. Did I even leave? Was I really gone for a year? Surreal.

Reverse culture shock isn’t the only reason I’m off. Since the decision to come home was made so suddenly, and I spent so much money in expensive AF Japan, my next move isn’t clear at the moment. I don’t think I have enough money to leave right away, so suddenly I’m feeling a little trapped and confused. It has also been overwhelmingly nice to see loved ones again, I’m not even sure if I want to leave.

So I’m in California. I have no apartment, no sense of home, and no proof that the last year in Asia even happened (other than the memories in my brain, the scar on my forehead, and this blog).

What happens next? Your guess is as good as mine.

Five Things

April 23, 2015April 23, 2015 NatBCo2 Comments

There are certain things I knew I’d love about living in Thailand.

Before I moved here about seven months ago, I knew I would definitely love Thai tea, the beaches, cheap street food, etc., but there are a few wildcards that I couldn’t have predicted.

Along the same lines, there were things that I knew I’d miss about living in San Francisco. I’d obviously miss my loved ones, burritos, and a San Francisco paycheck. Beyond that though, sometimes I get hit with a homesick feeling for the most specific and unexpected things.

Just to vent, below are five examples of each.

Five things I’m surprised to love about life in Thailand

1.Watching muay Thai

2. Using my tiny little broom to sweep my apartment (for reference)

3. Eating street food whole fish

4. Taking classes at the gym taught exclusively in Thai (I’ve never been more motivated to work hard in a class than when an instructor is yelling at me in Thai)

5. Primarily eating with spoons

Five things I didn’t expect to miss about living in SF

1. Riding my bike to work and the pleasure of walking around comfortably (aka not being hot as F any time I move)

2.Getting paid every two weeks

3.Wearing jeans, coats, and scarves

4. Taking the Muni train to Ocean Beach

5. The ability to use a credit card nearly everywhere

Wait, was this real life? — *A memory on a San Francisco stoop. Wait, was this even real life?*

Twenty Four!

December 29, 2014 NatBCo3 Comments

I’ve been listening to the Yeasayer song 2080 on repeat. The chorus hits home:

It’s a new year, I’m glad to be here
It’s a fresh spring, so let’s sing
In 2080 I’ll surely be dead
So don’t look ahead, never look ahead

It fits how I’m feeling at the end of 2014, not that I’m against looking ahead. I wildly alter my five year plan daily.

What resonates is the idea of simmering in the present, appreciating what’s happening now. I’m trying to savor the fact that it’s nearly 2015, that I’m 24 years old, and that I’m fortunate to be chasing my dreams (however awkwardly).

Yesterday, an AirAsia plane went missing en route to Singapore hours before I boarded a flight of my own. I keep getting reminded that EVERY MOMENT is a gift. It could have been my budget aircraft that went down. I could have easily died in the Petchaburi pool accident. I could get hit by a Toyota Camry in Fresno the next time I visit home. I’m lucky to be lazily typing this. With 2014 coming to a close, I wrote this blog post to reflect on that luck.

The year was a blur filled with epic experiences and way too many Negronis. I worked with incredible people, saw beautiful things. So much happened before Bangkok that most of the year feels like a lifetime ago. Here’s a snapshot recount:

January – European blitz with Ariel through Dublin, London, and Paris; Made a lot of people mad at Le Comptoir Du Relais Saint-Germain. March – My grandpa turned 90; Officially left my side gig at Café des Amis. May – One year anniversary in San Francisco; Family visits the city. July – Staged a bit at Alta CA.

(San Francisco Apartment)

August – Temporarily moved to Oakland; Outside Lands. September – Left Wagstaff; Last trips to Fresno and LA to see my family; Said goodbye to San Francisco with Leah, AJ, Clayton and Jacob; Got on a plane to Bangkok with Haley and Amber. Started at HotelQuickly. October – Weird solo adventures to Manila and Hua Hin. November – Nearly killed myself in that pool; Family and friends came to my rescue; Started freelance writing. December – Turned 24.

Beyond the snapshot, I reminisced about the year gone by as I stood in line at a Thai bank the other day.

I thought back on my time at Wagstaff, where I cut my teeth in the professional world and made so many mistakes. It was where I learned more than I could have imagined from Kiaran, Keelin, and the rest of the team. Where I picked up the phone and dialed my cross-country, invaluable mentor, Jeff. Where I lunched with Nicole, Meg, and Katherine. Where I fell in love with A16, TBD, and Farallon.

It was more than a job, it was a life, and a good one.

I wouldn’t have been at Wagstaff, or standing in line at a Bangkok bank, if it wasn’t for the boundless support from my family. My parents have consistently swooped in and saved the day with their love, resources, and manpower this year (and of course all the ones before that). My brother and sister in law took me into their Oakland home so I could save money before my move. My sister and her fiancé continue to keep me grounded, and feed me encouraging advice regularly. My extended family sends love through mail and social media. Whether bound to me by blood or law or whatever, these people helped build the foundation of my life. I’d be an idiot not to remind them how grateful I am for that help.

While I’m barrelling down this tunnel of thankfulness, I obviously can’t leave out my friends and coworkers at HotelQuickly. I arrived in Bangkok with the comfort of a job, complete with welcoming colleagues who turned out to be literal life savers.

Through the insanity of the year, friends new and old played vital roles in sustaining my happiness and sanity. To all of you, thank you.

This post can hardly scratch the surface of the joy, pain, and weirdness of 2014. If anything, I hope it can convey how happy I am to be watching another sunset hit the towering Bangkok skyscrapers.

I’ll leave you with some visuals of the year:

(Ariel does Paris)

(Dinner at Saison)

(Papa turns 90)

Cliché Bangkok

October 3, 2014October 3, 2014 NatBCo1 Comment

It’s been about two and a half weeks since I moved to Bangkok, so I still have a free pass to do cliché, touristy things. And touristy things I have done! Haley and Amber (the friends I flew over here with) ended their jaunt through Cambodia, Vietnam, and Thailand with a visit to Bangkok. First item on the agenda: take them to a rooftop bar.

We headed to just the place after eating at a tourist-focused restaurant near Cheap Charlie’s. At Above 11, a bar on the 3oth-something floor of the Fraser Suites, we met up with my coworker and his group. The view was fantastic, and we had a great time hearing about their travels and swapping culture shock moments. Also great: the wild maze (literally, a hedge maze) leading to the bathroom.

After work the following day, Haley and I intended to find a night market in Chinatown for street food. Instead, we ended up stopping at the night flower market on accident, a very sweet-smelling accident. We walked around and ate some fried street snacks before stopping at a food stall as it started to rain. Although we wanted the most touristy dish on the planet (Pad Thai, of course), we settled for for mixed vegetables and rice (and giant beers).

After the meal, we took a tuk tuk to meet up with a new friend Jeff, a British expat fluent in Thai. He suggested Khao San Road, aka “the center of the backpacker universe” and I was excited to go and see the infamous area. You couldn’t take a photo without three plastered tourists attempting to photobomb your moment. Instead of a bucket of cocktails, Haley and I had fresh coconut ice cream served brilliantly in a coconut.

We fought through the hoards of drunk tourists and pushy vendors until we found Jeff. A few minutes of weaving our way through the neighborhood, we settled into a bar away from the chaos of the main road. We learned a lot from Jeff, who is expertly versed in the Thai language and culture. The night was great, even after being swarmed by the laughing gas salesmen of Khao San Road. Another item checked off of a standard Bangkok bucket list.

On Thursday, Haley met me after work for a Vietnamese dinner with my coworkers. I didn’t realize that the Vietnamese did flan, you learn something new every day! As tourists do, we walked to the Patpong night market after dinner. The red light district is not necessarily my favorite place to go, but we wanted to see a night market and the one at Patpong was nearby. It had the usual suspects: elephant-print clothing, ping pong show hawkers, and bizarre trinkets that you would truly never need (I’m looking at you, Coca-Cola clock). We spied a tattoo parlor and I decided to go for it, having thought about the idea of getting another tattoo for a few days. Thai culture seems to have a soft spot for tattoos, and “When in Rome” seemed like an easy justification for a bad idea.

I walked up to Billy’s Studio (billystattoo@hotmail.com for any interested takers) and grilled the men about the cleanliness of their needles. Feeling convinced that the transaction would be clean (although still ridiculous), I went in and sat on the black leather bench and showed the men what I wanted. Feeling nostalgic for San Francisco, I went with the coordinates of the city I left just two weeks ago.

The tattoo artist turned on Pitbull to accompany the experience, but he motioned for us to pick the music from YouTube ourselves. DJ Haley took requests and played some favorites to ease the pain. The playlist included, but wasn’t limited to:

STRKFKR – When I’m Alive

STRKFKR – Girls Just Want to Have Fun (obviously)

Santigold– Pirate In The Water

Little Dragon – Shuffle A Dream

When it was over, I looked down at my new, permanent addition to my body. It sort of looked like a prison-esque tattoo which was definitely not my intention. I probably should have thought a little more about what exact coordinates of San Francisco I would like to see forever, instead of an apartment building for the homeless in the Tenderloin. When making forever decisions, maybe throw some thought into it – or not. I paid my 1,000 baht ($30) and left.

Haley and I walked around a bit more before finding some street mango and sticky rice being prepared with the utmost care by an old Thai woman. We waited patiently as she carved our favorite Thai dessert, then ate it on the side of the road. We watched people walk by, passing the lined up prostitutes waiting for customers. The sheer volume of sex workers in Bangkok is mind-blowing. We left feeling sad and full.

Haley packed up her belongings and e-checked into her flight for Bali. It was great to have her and Amber as houseguests, even if it was just for a short period of time. After her Indonesian getaway, Haley will be moving to Chiang Mai to do an epic internship, and I can’t wait to visit as often as possible.

I doubt this week will be the end of my cliché activities in Thailand, but it was nice to get some of the most touristy things out of the way early. Up next: ride an elephant while eating Pad Thai.

Getting to Thailand

September 16, 2014September 16, 2014 NatBCo5 Comments

On Saturday, September 13, I left San Francisco to start a new chapter in Bangkok.

As I sat in the Manila airport on Monday morning after a 14 hour flight from SFO, it still didn’t seem like reality. Why would I leave a life I loved in California to be extremely uncomfortable in Southeast Asia?

With a five hour layover in Manila, things were off to a good start. The people were happy and friendly, and there was free WIFI. My friends Haley and Amber, who were off to Vietnam, were with me the first leg of the trip. We managed the 14 hour flight and enjoyed a coffee in Manila as they waited for their plane to take leave for Ho Chi Minh. When it was time for them to go, I just stood there in a stupor. This was it, I was about to be alone in Asia. I’ve never done anything epic alone, so the idea of literally flying solo was hard to take in. I took photos of them in a panic as they boarded their plane.

They leave :( — Haley and Amber, off to Vietnam

I paced the terminal and found myself in a 30 person line for the bathroom. I thought it was nice that they had a stall set aside for “Elderly Use Only” even though that meant the wait was wildly long. Using What’s App, I stressfully communicated with loved ones back in the USA until my 8:50 flight to Bangkok.

When I landed in Bangkok and went through customs, I logged into the airport’s free WIFI and opened HotelQuickly, the app I would be working for, to book my first hotel room. After booking a night at the Hotel Icon Bangkok, I found a metered taxi and headed for the city. My taxi driver may have been the least friendly person in Thailand, but I tried to stay happy despite the 24+ hours of total travel time. I spotted a billboard on the freeway that helped comfort me in my insane decision to move here:

“Opportunity has landed, welcome to Bangkok” was a comforting sight to see. Thirty minutes and less than $10 later, I was at the hotel where I was greeted with a sweet, violet-colored beverage and an iced cold towel. I checked into my room and was still in a general disbelief.

After so much travel time and reading up on the possible horrors that could happen to a single woman traveling, I was extremely paranoid to leave my room again. I had been so fixated on the idea that everyone was going to rob me, rip me off, or kidnap me that the thought of leaving my safe little abode was overwhelming. I showered and lingered for two hours before mustering up the willpower to go and buy a cell phone.

I took many wrong turns, went into many wrong buildings, but finally ended up at the TrueMove H store where I bought a prepaid phone for $20 from a man who spoke very little English. I kept finding that whenever I asked people (in Thai) if they speak English, they find it hilarious and usually laughed at me. So that’s great.

Overwhelmed and jetlagged, I went back to the BTS (the skytrain) and got off when I saw a sign for massage. I settled into a comfortable chair at the massage parlor and had one of the best foot massages of my existence. This could have been due to the roller coaster of emotions I had experienced over the past week, or just that the woman was a true genius. Either way, it was heaven. The cherry on top of the day was dinner: my first pad thai at a place called Lee’s near my hotel.

I walked back to my hotel and flopped into my bed. I continued to repeat “how is this real?” as I talked to family and friends online. The first day was under my belt.

North Beach, San Francisco 9.4.14

September 4, 2014 NatBCoLeave a comment

Morning in San Francisco